French Toast:

-Whole Wheat Raisin Bread
-Whole Milk
-2 Eggs
-Vanilla
-nutmeg
-cinnamon
-Butter

Heat large Heavy Skillet on medium high heat with 1 pat of butter.
Beat eggs, 2 TB milk, 1 teaspoon vanilla, dash of nutmeg and dash of milk.
dip bread in egg mixture to coat both sides. let excess drip off.
cook until brown on both sides, about 2 minutes.

Serve with hot syrup, bacon and banana slices.

its about that time: every major life change i have encountered, it always gets followed up with a haircut. whats the verdict?

how short should i go?

There's nothing like watching a few episodes of hoarders on a monday night with two of your gal pals to realize that life takes work. Even further, things don't magically clean up after themselves. Par example, i have been faced with some interesting crossroads (which btw i secretly really want to see. yes the movie with britney), meaning that my personal life and my professional life have been less than stellar lately.

I can't sit back and feel sorry for myself that the someone i loved very much hurt me repeatedly. I have to help myself move on.

I also realized that my dream job wont fall into my lap just because i think that i'm qualified.

I had a horrible nightmare that i would wake up one day, 50, living at home in my hoarded mess of a life. I am not a hoarder, but the point is, i have to work at these things for any real change to happen.

so i realized that i am and always have been a little bitch. in my personal life, in my professional life... just in all aspects of life, i have continually allowed my fear of confrontation to get in the way of realizing my goals. I am determined to end that now!

I have been mulling over this two jobs situation, and considering that i am not happy, not earning a whole lot and am not receiving stellar health benefits (or any health benefits at all), there is not reason to feel guilty about quitting one of my jobs in order to pursue my dreams.

speaking of which, this evening i got a text from X. I had to talk to my friend about what to do before realizing i was again being a pussy and ignored his message.

case in point: time to just man the fuck up, because there is no need to sugar coat it for a guy who broke your heart, or for a boss you barely know.

i'mma do me. i'mma do me.

"When life gives you lemons, ask for the vodka, amiright?"

i would like to get inspired. perhaps i have talked about this before as i frequently think about it. it's a rainy day, and i'm gonna take the camera back out.

I had a complete emotional breakdown today.
Sometimes life is just... hard.

"Being 20 is a terrible thing.
There is a stillness in the air.
I see leaves rustle,
and crinkle in the stifling heat.
Hearing nothing though,
I am unable to move,
Watching them die,
While I hold the hose."

p.s. two days ago during the meditation portion of my yoga class, i burst out crying. for no reason.
or maybe i was missing X.
fuck meditation. i don't need to be alone with my thoughts for a full 5 minutes.